Wednesday, July 4, 2012

My Cousin Suffers from "FIAS"-Food Ingredient Avoidance Syndrome

My cousin cracks me up sometimes. When it comes to food, she can be like a little kid. Remember "Mikey?" Yeah, she's like that. She hates everything. I don't dare tell her what ingredients I'm going to use. On Tuesday, everyone wanted spaghetti and meatballs for supper. My cousin asked me about the meatballs:

E.J.: "Do they have onions in them?"

Me: "Yes."

E.J.: "Ughhhh!"

Me: "...and garlic and parmesan cheese, too."

E.J.: "Ughhhhh!"

I flipped through the recipe rolodex in my mind, searching for something she may have eaten that had parmesan cheese.

Me: "Have you ever eaten Fettuccine Alfredo?"

E.J.: "Is that the stuff with the white sauce?"

Me: "Yes. It has parmesan in it. Did you like it?"

E.J.: "I guess."

Me: ".......*sigh*........well, if you cook savory food you have to use those ingredients. Otherwise, what's the point?"

E.J.: "Yeah, true."

Me: "Okay, I will leave some meatballs plain. How's that?"

E.J.: "Okay."

So I lied. I didn't leave any of them plain. And you know what? She loved them! She ate all of her meal right down to the plate bone. I asked her how many points I got. She said, "10."

I could tell she wasn't fibbing because she really ate as if she was enjoying the food, rather than forcing it down. Plus, when she doesn't like something, she'll pick it out of her food. None of that occurred. All I can say is: Yay!!

Homemade meatballs and homemade sauce. The spaghetti wasn't homemade, but it was imported from Italy. That's the next best thing to having homemade pasta. Italy knows pasta. (Yeah, I know, "DUH!")

Seriously, American pasta just can't hold a candle. Sure, you can boil the hell out of any pasta and ruin it, but Italian pasta holds together a lot better and it can take some abuse before it gives up the goat.

American pasta is processed differently and if you overcook it for even a few extra seconds, you're screwed. You have pasta earthworms. Just as well throw it out to the chickens. Always use Italian pasta. It's the "Terminator" of pastas. (If you don't know what that means, then go rent "The Terminator," starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. In fact, rent them all.)

Of course, we had to have garlic bread. I made some "Cheater Garlic Bread." This is the recipe I use when I want to make garlic bread faster. It's a good recipe, which uses garlic powder instead of fresh garlic. Since my back told me I was about done in the kitchen after I made the meatballs and sauce, Cheater Garlic Bread was definitely the way to go on Tuesday night.

Wednesday is the 4th of July, so have a wonderful holiday!

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